If you’ve ever held the scissors in cutting ties, you know breaking up is not easy. In fact, most people drag relationships on way longer than they should due to loneliness, guilt, jealousy and financial situations (who wants to move out and pay full rent?). Couples often confuse comfort with compatibility, putting themselves through emotional obstacles that are impossible to win.
Below are the top 6 signs your relationship is kaput along with 6 reasons you need to end it NOW.
You have a bad case of the ‘EWs’: The second you get the ‘ew feeling’ there is no return. Whether you’re watching him or her eat, converse with others, work-out, make a joke or simply exist in the world- you are so turned off it makes you cringe.
End it now: Not only have you lost the hots for your partner, but you have also rejected his or her behavior all together. But just think- your partner deserves to be just as happy as you do. The more you string the relationship along the less chance your partner has at finding someone who actually appreciates the things that make you gag. Don’t be selfish!
‘Cricket, Cricket…”: Which is worse? Not knowing what to talk about or not wanting to talk about anything at all? Unfortunately both dilemmas are equally present when a relationship is coming to an end. When the waiter talks more than your partner at dinner or if you have absolutely no idea where he or she has been in the past 48 hours, it is clear you have lost interest in keeping up with each other.
End it now: According to studies, communication is the most important factor in maintaining a healthy relationship. People are not objects and are constantly undergoing change, adversity, and new milestones. To adapt and fulfill another person’s needs, communication needs to be on its game at all times. By not communicating you are treating your partner like a broken-down car or dead flowers: not worth the maintenance.
“I’ve had my period for 3 weeks, weird right?”: You know your relationship is over when you’re not only making excuses, but your making really bad excuses to get out of having sex (or cuddling, holding hands, or kissing…). In fact, once the excuses start rolling in, you should immediately sense something’s wrong.
End it now: Hey- if 80 year old men can drive themselves to CVS, pick up a box of Viagra, pay for it, drive home, and do it for 4 hours, your man or woman has no excuse. This is often one of the first clues of detachment. There’s a reason why relationships differ from regular friendships and if the intimacy and affection isn’t there, you’re defeating the entire purpose.
Hide and Seek: Just like the game, one person stalks while the other hides for their life, TRYING to say with their actions what they can’t say in words and that is IM OVER IT. Whether you’re the ‘nagger,’ constantly calling, showing up, texting, (and when that fails) texting his or her friends, complaining or crying, or the hider, ignoring your partner at all costs, it is safe to say this relationship needs to end.
End it now: The saddest part about this is that Hide and Seek relationships do exist. Not only are you being dishonest with your partner, you are also putting way too much time, effort and strategy into hiding from someone you have the ability to break up with! If your partner is nagging you it means you’re not communicating and they want answers. Give your partner a favor and communicate that it’s over before it gets worse.
ITS WAR: Don’t get me wrong; every relationship needs a good blow out every now and then, but if you don’t do damage control, you can count on trouble. Perhaps your partner has done something to permanently sabotage the relationship or there are just certain issues such as kids, religion, work, family or habits that cannot be agreed on. Either way, it’s important to pin point exactly what is causing the fights and decide whether or not the point of disinterest is fixable. If it’s not, throw up your white flag and get out.
End it now: Plain and simple: fighting is toxic. There is a huge difference between fighting for change in a relationship and fighting to change someone. Telling him to delete an ex on Facebook, clawing his face off for forgetting dinner reservations, demanding he skip guy’s night, and continuing to bring up the same problem over and over again only proves that his way of life is not compatible with yours. Don’t try to fix something that’s already broken.
New Thrills: You know your relationship is coming to an end when your partner is no longer an outlet for fun and excitement. It’s also over when the thought of cheating crosses your mind. When you first meet, your entire weekends, let alone week days, are fixed around each other’s schedule, lunch breaks, favorite bars and more. While the honeymoon phase does plateau eventually, there is no reason for you to find your significant other boring. If you have your sights on traveling, meeting new people, or having no strings attached, you need to stop carrying your relationship as a burden.
End it now: Although you may be compatible, life is filled with different phases, and just because you get along, doesn’t mean the timing is right. When you have only one life to live, why would you want to be with someone who holds you back?
Have you ever stayed in a doomed relationship? How did you finally get out of it?
How was the best way you’ve ended a relationship? The worst?
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